Monday, December 17, 2012

4000 Islands

On the boat you can see them. Dubbed earlier as the '4000 rocks,' gorgeous little green burst ups of island, amongst a gorgeous clear sea. The air is quiet as we approach don det, the more popular island to stop at. When you get there you have two choices: sunset side or sunrise side. Basically, starting at the northern tip of the island, this means turn right and get a bungalow with a view of the sunset, or turn left for sunrise. I followed paz who was looking for two of his friends, with their only instructions being sunset side. We walked the entirety of the sunset side, screaming their names, but eventually gave up and picked the first reasonable bathroom-containing bungalow we found.

Moved in, changed, and sat at their restaurant (all the restaurants were open air with various pillows to sit on and stare at the gorgeous surroundings.) Fruit smoothies went down and paz mished to find his friends. It was rather quick that I realised this island's similarity to nimbin, as menus sparkled with the word 'happy' as an alternate way of ordering things, or an additional topping. We found the aforementioned friends and all hung out enjoying the beautiful peaceful place. Eventually I finally showered (ish) and then relaxed for a bit before going back to catch the sunset. It was gorgeous, reflecting perfectly off of the water. With the end of the sun though came the start of bugs. 

We moved to another restaurant and got what should be known as dinner 2. Happy shakes were ordered and after a bit we moved to the happy bar, a reggae like bar owned by an awesome british indian dude. He was a great time and treated us well, until we were so tired that we had to head back to the bungalow for bed. 

After failing to wake up for the sunrise, we were up eventually and ready for breakfast. The weather was scorching, so instead of going for a bike ride, decided to rent tubes. This started off fun, but rapidly got terrifying as our tubes became difficult to control, and we could hear the waterfall not too far in our future. I grabbed on to the branches of little islands, and thankfully the company made sure I got to a rocky shore safely. The water was filled with green seaweed like plant matter, which was difficult to walk through, as it clung around our ankles. 

Once we were out and comfortably on land we went to an organic garden area gone pizza restaurant, owned by a sweet (british?) couple. They were to have a pingpong tournament that paz's friend wanted to participate in, since apparently he was the best in israel when he was 9 years old. We all got pizzas and the tournament began. I had a small nap in a hammock, and as planned, the friend beat everyone out easily.

Next we raced to catch the sunset, which I had wanted to timelapse, but my gopro died too early :/. Next time! When that was done we went out to another random place to eat, and then the bar that was their 'movie theater' of sorts to watch superbad. Twas another gorgeous 4000 island night. 

Again I failed to wake up for the sunrise, but I was up and moving at 7 to catch my bus to siem reap at 8. The instructions were 'meet at the beach.' Really? Please be more vague. I got some muesli, yogurt, and bananas and went. Easy enough, there were heaps of boats making trips. I got onto one and was off. Upon landing, we had another hour to kill before getting on a bus.

I bought snacks and weird street donuts and eventually piled onto the uncomfortable 'vip' bus to cross the border. Before leaving we had to fill out visa and entrance cards, pay, and leave our passports with the bus driver. I was definitely overcharged, and I was uncomfortable leaving my passport, but the majority of the bus did it and I figured it'd be easier in the long run. We got to the border quite quickly and all had to get out and walk across it.

We waited over an hour on the cambodian side for the bus to come through. When it finally did we piled in again (more people now) and were off. We stopped once at an overpriced pitstop area, and then again to switch busses at like 730pm, when we were splitting between people going to siem reap, and people going to phnom penh.

We didn't get in until 11pm, where I followed two german girls looking for accomodation, but ended up settling with the tuktuk driver's suggestion of some hostel.

Vang Vieng to 4000 Islands Journey

As title states, this journey is one worth mentioning. 21 hours was the estimate (only slightly over $30), and shuttle to tuk tuk to sleeper bus to bus to boat was the journey. I read online a bit about this 'sleeper bus,' filled with proper beds and two levels. A couple that had blogged their travels noted it as a less than double bed, way too short for normal sized humans, wherein you share the bed with a travel companion, or if alone, a stranger. When booking, I queried about this, asking if I should buy two tickets so I don't have to share a bed. The response was a laugh, asking if I was trying to get some, and then assuring me I would have my own bed. 

The first leg of the journey was a shuttle from hostel to ventiene, which took 4.5 hours, and was no struggle with good company and a spacious environment. The only stress was the obnoxious frequent beeping from the driver, and his irritating lao music choice. 

Once dropped in ventiene I was left with 2 hours before catching the next leg. I went for a wander around  the night market (nothing special) and then satdown to have dinner at some crowded western place. I got a overly oily salad and overly oily cheesy garlic bread. All good though. While waiting for the next bus to come (now 15 minutes late) I went to socialise and find travel buddies for the ride. I met 2 israeli guys, one of whom was going to pakse, and potentially continuing on the 4000 islands as well. The other was just keeping him company. Once the chariot, tuk tuk, arrive, paz (the one going to pakse) and I got on. It was a reasonably long journey where we met the joining crew and also decided to share a bed if the dude lied to me, and we would be sharing with strangers. As we got to the bus, I squinted to see into its top level and noticed my fear-- each bed had 2 numbers. I entered, heading to my assigned downstairs bed, told first to remove my shoes. As I crouched and crawled through the tiny aisle space, my heart went out to the british guy on the tuk tuk with shoulders way broader than this space. I arrived at my bed, already occupied by a lao lady who seemed to speak no english when I tried to describe to her my potential bed swap. I went upstairs to find paz, figuring out the same thing. The beds were barely bigger than singles, and must have been no more than 5'5" long. We managed to convince some french guys we were dating and then the dude who was supposed to stay with paz, further convinced the bus people to let him stay in this weird random single bed (coffin sized) that was right over the staircase to the toilet, with little fallproof barrier. 

All in all it was funny to play couple, coming up with stories for how we met and what not, and after staying up for ages with the strength of one valium (we were both given on earlier bus rides by people who took advantage of the fact that one need not a perscription for some in this country) we took our second and passed out hard. 

7am we were stopped for brekky and waiting for the next bus. After that 2.5 hours from pakse, (paz at this point decided to go through to the islands) there was a final boat-- a long boat. The ride wasn't too bad, even though the top of our boat being only inches above the waterline made me a bit wary. 

Before we knew it (23 hours after I started), 4000 islands.

Vang Vieng

Eventually we got to vang vieng, and a bunch of us piled into the 6+person tuktuk to get dropped off. I had booked the night in advance at a guesthouse called nana's, and hendric joined me there. We checked into our 5 person room, each with a single bed (no bunks!) And paid our $3 a night fee. We then decided to head out and explore the city, or at least what's left of it. Vang vieng, to anyone who's been there prior to ~3 months ago, was a party haven, filled with drunk people tubing down the river, pulling themselves into bars for mushie shakes, buckets of alcohol, and stupid fun. Unfortunately, heaps of idiots (usually australians) would kill themselves every year, doing backflips into shallow rocks and whatnot, so a bit ago a ban was placed, and all the bars along the river were shutdown. The quality of vang vieng wasn't known to us because of this, but we reckoned it was still worth checking out.

It was early evening and we wandered around unsuccessfully, looking for crowds of people. Eventually we stopped a canadian couple on the road and they sort of gave us the run down of the town, like where to go, and what could be fun to see. We decided to rent a motorbike. Hendric said he drives one at home, so I felt safe and we got one for 24 hours, for less than $10 all together. The dude wanted a passport as collateral, but I somehow convinced him to accept my 18+ card instead (which is mental, since it's worth nothing, contains basically zero information, and is completely unnecessary for my wellbeing, now that I've left new zealand. The bike was ghetto, and manual (which meant I was not going to try to ride it). Immediately I realised it wasn't going to be the safest of evenings nor choices, but we carried on. I grabbed my gopro and we took the rocky, muddy, dangerous as road to get to blue lagoon, where there were to be epic caves.
Part of the way there we saw a small blue puddle on the side of the road and cheered wildly. BLUE LAGOON! Jokes, obviously, but after having to push the bike through a massive puddle, and nearly die heaps of times, the puddle was thrilling enough.

A wee bit later we saw what we were actually waiting for-- the blue lagoon. It was approaching night time, so going for a swim in our not-swim-attire clothing wasn't much an option, so we continued onto the massive cave. Torches in hand we trekked up a makeshift rock staircase, ascending as vertically as the waterfall before. When we finally reached the top, cave. It was crazy, deep, and apparently went on for ages. We went through the main front bit, not horribly pitch black, but still quite scary and slippery. The rock formations were amazing, and leftover laobeers hilarious. There was a buddha setup inside for prayer. After having a mini gopro confessional period, joking about my inability to function whilst trekking, we followed the last bits of sunlight to the exit, and remounted the bike for our ride home. Similarly scary, much darker, and a failed river crossing ride later, home. Showered changed, and down to meet people for drinks and dinner.

A crew had already formed at the base of our hostel with denise from singapore (who interchangeably went by dennis or singaporn, or simply porn), adriane from arizona, guido and herman from holland, julian from amsterdam, and zoe and joe, the british couple. We opted for street food sandwiches to save the trouble of ordering food, and I got a delicious omelette/cheese/beef burger, which she initially presented to me as ham cheese and chicken. How that mistake happened, I have no idea. We made moves to an irish bar where on behalf of herman's birthday, drinks were being bought and shared like crazy. The british couple and I bought rounds of 3 for 30k vodka redbulls (dangerous), everyone gave in to some tequila shots, and some guy who knew the owner wouldn't stop giving me whisky cokes. It was a messy night that ended up taking us to the moon bar, at the early closing of the irish bar. The moon bar/club is across the air strip where planes used to land, and is the scene for late night activity. All was fun until heading back to find the room locked. Herman and I struggled for ages to get reception to give us the kay (there was only one key for the room that everyone was supposed to share), and eventually got in.

The next morning I was up and moving, walking outside into a wall of rain. Shit. I sat down for some breakfast, chatting to two german girls who had been going for monthas as their pre uni gap year, and contemplated how to manage the undesirably wet day. The lot of us decided to wait for the weather to better before going tubing. At 1, it was all good and we got into ridiculous uniform (yellow tubing singlet and pink tubing shorts) before heading to rent our tubes. We were a group of 7, and tied all the tubes together with shoelaces and backpack strings, forming a massive molecular looking clump before heading in. The water was refreshing, and we all had beers in our backpacks, ready to adventure. The three or so hours we spent tubing were obnoxiously relaxing, aside from the wee trip we decided to take to a little cave. We saw the sign, as well as the only other group of people who seemed to be tubing that day, and pulled over, bringng our massive raft ashore. Twas a short walk first to then pay an entrance fee and get a headlamp. Then it was straight uphill, on shotty wooden 'ladders' and hard to manage rocks, all filled with ants and strange flying massive bugs. Mosquito bites were going around like it was a new fad, and with the majority of us barefoot, no one was happy. Not too far from the top, a few of us said fuck it and went back. We chilled in the river waiting for the rest to come down and assure us that we hadn't missed much. The rest of the float was easy, only twice detatching from rock obstacles, but getting back together easily. Tubes were flipped, and standing people fell, but no injuries by the end.

Post tube we all got sandwiches and then I went back for a now drunk shower and nap. As the day turned to night a few of us went to some restaurant showing soccer for dinner, a disappointment for me as most of the other establishments showed family guy or friends all day lkong. The set ups were like massive couchy benches surrounding wooden tables, where you'd sit shoeless, watching american television. I got an asian noodle soup dish, and finally rehydrated my body with heaps of water.

I took the night lightly, with little desire to keep drinking nor to be hungover on the hell bus ride of the next day, only having a few at the irish bar and then pkaying some beer pong. We met two canadian guys dressed as an octopus and a tiger (don't ask me why) who were in the process of opening a bar in vang vieng, which was fitting with their viva veng vieng tattoos.

The night ended early, and I finally had a good sleep before waking up for breakfast, packing, internet, hanging around, goodbyes, and a bus ride to the 4000 islands.

Other things:

Whitening soap: so, soap sometimes says whitening on it, as if it was supposed to be toothpaste or something, but I asked people what it meant, and apparently asian people find paler whiter skin to be more attractive and ideal, so the soap whitens.... which means there's bleach or something in it? normal.

Right side of the road: in laos they drive on the right side of the road! it's weird to see again. I keep going to the wrong side of the car.

Curfew: A lot of laos has a curfew since the towns started as monk villages, and the aforementioned morning wakeups would require an early bedtime.

Prices don't make sense... Ice cream bar was $0.50 less than my accomodation

Luang Prabang

As I begin to approach the plane, all I hear are damiens warning words telling me not to fly on any airplane that's not an airbus, or doesn't begin with two specific letters... What were those letters? Sure as hell they weren't the ones painted on the side of this flying coffin I was about to step into. 4 seats per row, 20 rows, 2 propellors, little chance of survival. it was a 50 minute flight (taking the place of an otherwise 2.5 day bus and slow boat) that had me at the window, with no one next to me, and a free funny meal (fish burger, tiny oranges, sticky banana cake). The fat man nearby snored during the entire duration of the trip, only stopping to eat his fishburger without the bun.
When we landed we went to get onsite visas which cost $35 for american, $30 for most other nationalities, and $40 for some sparse others. I also had to throw in an extra dollar since I didn't bring a photo of myself, but they gave it back for some reason.
Here the currency is called kip, and it's about 8,000 kip to 1 usd.. Millionaire once more at the first atm trip. as I was taking out money some man was pestering me to share a cab to save money, but all the airport shuttles were price regulated per person and we were going in totally different directions. Fucking fast talking nutter. Address in hand I finally made it out to the khammany guest house, being welcomed by tons of shoes left outside indicating a large crowd. I took mine off (oh reminds me, I totally forgot to mention, on my second to last day in chiang mai I destroyed my flip flops in a feat of total self retardation. I was on my way to secure some much needed internetting, and whilst approaching the sidewalk's curb noticed that the street looked a bit odd, covered in dark black rocks. Without giving it much though, dumb fuck jennie decided to step down onto the freshly laid asphalt, so fresh as to not even have been rolled over yet by that massive rolling truck I shouldve also noticed down the road. Once I stepped, I understood, so quickly, but hilariously cautiously, did I make my way to the otherside, immediately relieved at having caused no burns. The man sitting at a cafe outside asked if I was okay, and said he was going to shout out to stop me, but it looked like I was aware of the ground's heat. He said 10 minutes earlier a british lady, also in flop, had to go to the hospital for severe foot burns. Flip flops lost, but lesson learned).
I checked in and was escorted to my dorm upstairs, where canadian molly immediately welcomed me and helped me figure out plans for my short stay there. I also met jessica and khal, two others in my room (arizona girl, and syrian/french/boston dude). Khal, the mit graduate, phd physician, gone round-the-world photographer had just come back from shooting and was going through photos, simultaneously trying to pick his best photo so far to send to a photo competition. I helped with narrowing them down, and my god his work was amazing. Photography, as such an accessible art, has always found struggles with me in determining what's art and what's not, similar to djing as music. Khal's photos were brilliant, and my favourite was an unexpected, usually ignored, but his favourite as well, shot of a busy japanese street crossing, with the focus of the picture being very interesting and almost hard to settle on.
Eventually we made our way out to the night market and out for dinner, stopping first for a fruit smoothie- these are impossibly good, impossibly cheap, and so addicting. I got one that was purely dragonfruit-- resounding success. We ate at some found restaurant where I satiated my pizza cravings with a massive pie and beerlao. I think chang is still my favourite. We shared stories of medical history and then went back for a stroll through the market, where my eyes locked with various items I had to struggle not to buy. Then we went to utopia, a hippie haven backpackers bar. The tables are on the floor and you can smoke shisha there. It was great, albeit the music selection a bit weird, but by 1130 we were all getting forced out, hustled out of our seats, and given plastic cups to finish our drinks on our way home. Hheaps of people went on to the bowling alley, one of the few places that remained open past the town's midnight curfew, but the 4 of us opted to head back and get some shut eye.
Come morning I enjoyed the free breakfast, which is really just some baguette with a few spreads, tea and coffee, before heading out with jessica to the massive waterfall. About 30km away, we got a tuktuk for 35k each (though we had to tell the people we shared it with that we were paying 50) and after the long ride, got dropped off at a little spot, with a trail leading us to the waterfalls. First en route was a spot to look at these asian black bears which were caged off but pretty cute to see. Then there was a tigerless tiger enclosure, and then the many siwmming holes began to appear. Gorgeous lakes filled with travellers swimming and jumping off of ledges into the waterfall's spillout. As we continued up, we saw waterfall tier after waterfall tier, until reaching the final grand stop, the massive waterfall. It was mental. So gorgeous, so worth going to see it. We hiked up the side of it, a grueling vertical climb that reminded me how shit I am at hiking, but getting to the top of it was really cool. Hiking down as a bit more of a mission, but jess was really helpful to barefoot, cautious me, and I had my own extra sense of security as she is a girl scout leader (whether or not that should actually make me feel better). After we made our way back to the first swimming hole where we went for a wuick swim, watching people jump off the side and do flips in, or more often embarrass themselves with bellyflops. Eventually we were on our way out, stopping for kebabs and grilled bananas first. When we got back to our hostel, the khammany inn, we showered and looked at gopro footage of the day. Jess then was off, bussing to her next stop, and I found molly again to get in some food and shopping. I had a massive sandwich before spending too much money on opium pipes that I'm not even positive I can get back into america, and lao wine, which is whisky with a snake inside (I mean, not too much... If I have to ditch the whisky it was $3 lost). The lady I bought the whisky from made us try all of her alcohols which was kind of nice, but more likely a sales tactic. Lao rice wine is awesome.
Molly haggled hard for a necklace and some clothing items, getting into a hilarious price war with a lady about some harem pants, going up and down by 12cents.
After I ate more as we went to a food alley and I saw two tiny birds on a kebab that looked worth trying. It was hard to get meat off of the tiny creature, and I wasn't too fond of its head being so apparent, but it was yummy. They had buffet options as well where you could fill a plate for 10k, but I was too full. On our walk back we stopped for little coconut dessert things, similar to what I had in chiang mai that was filled with squid, but less savoury. I packed for a bit, played on the internet stressing about having no accomodation for christmas nor new years, and then was heading to bed, but got distracted by the people on the terrace chatting. I met a canadian guy who was struggling to make a decision after just getting an ultimatum from his at-home girlfriend, telling him to come home immediately or they were over. He was traveling with a female friend of his, and jealousy was taking over his girlfriend, quite early into his trip. I think we all convinced him to stay abroad, hopefully!
My alarm went off at 545am and I went out with hendric, a singaporan 25 tear old in my dorm room who similarly wanted to get up early and watch the monk procession, where they all walkin in a line and get offerings (sticky rice) from locals waiting outside scopping it into their baskets. We missed their passing our hostel, but caught up with them a little ways away, watching the trail of extremely young monks get their feed. It was very interesting to see, though we felt a bit like rude paparazzi following close. Hendric was also taking the 830am bus that morning with me to veng vieng, so after a brief nap at our return, we were off.
The first hour of the bus ride, as suggested by various sources online, was absolutely hellish, with the windiest, crappiest roads I've ever experienced, and no space on the mini bus. It was cramped and hot and horrific, as I sat there trying to close my eyes as to not vomit. Once we stopped and overpaid for bags of chips, I felt a little better, with 5 more hours of travel to go. The rest was a bit easier, and I took the headrest off my seat, resting it on my shoulder as a weird side pillow.

Monday, December 10, 2012

Chiang Mai

The bus ride turned out to be phenomenally easy and painless, and though I was in and out of sleep all night, I got there in one piece, well rested. It was 7am, and I got into a taxi (and by taxi I mean pick up truck type of vehicle with the whole back section covered and filled with wee benches, for them to drop off people in succession. I was in there with 2 monks and we chatted briefly about a monk chat thing they do 3 times a week for people to come in and talk to the monks. I'll probably go.

I was then dropped off at my hostel, signed up for a cooking class that would depart in an hour for that day, and an elephant tour for the next day. I got a brief period of shut eye before heading off to the cooking class which went from our hostel to a little school to pick out items from a menu which we would be making later. The group 4 couples and 4 people traveling alone, with a pretty big age range. Next we were off to a market where we were taught a lot about various types of food like noodles, tofu, rice, and spices we could buy there. I realised at this point that I left my camera battery in the wall instead of taking it with me. Bugger. I asked the tourguide if there was any way I could get driven back to get it and he took me on some motorbike to grab it. People are so good. Next we went to a farm and walked around smelling various things and learning about fruits and veges in thailand. There's a lot that one wouldn't be able to get outside of thailand which was interesting, specifically these little eggplants that were circular and green. In gili we were talking about how the thing they called eggplants weren't actually eggplants, and now I know why. This was also the site for our cooking, which started with a stir fry dish. I went with pad thai, like most of the people there (cause I mean, how could you not?) And A, our hilarious, miniature asian instructor showed us all how to make it, instructed us to cut the veges, and then set us to work at our wok stations around the stove. Honesly, delicious and so incredibly easy. Next was an appetiser, and I went with spring rolls for the experience to know what's inside, how to roll one, and deep frying something. Others went with various salads, but as far as rolling goes, I got the 'best rolled spring rolls' title. He went step by step through each of the chosen items so we could all learn how they're made. The spring rolls were delicious in the end. Our next move was to prepare curry paste and soup ingrediants. The curry I picked was masoman, an indian one. We took turns using the massive mortar and pestal, crushing spicy smelling things to A's satisfaction. The soup was to be a coconut soup. We left the ingredients to rest and started on dessert. I went with sticky rice and mango, which had extremely minimal preparation on my part. Oh well. A lot of the others made fried bananas which was cool to taste and see. Once desserts were settled, we cooked the curry, adding chicken and a lot of coconut milk mostly. It was quick and delicious, with a controlled level of spicy. The soup was also quick to cook in the coconut milk. We all tried palm sugar as well, to know what we were putting in, and it was obnoxiously sweet but good. The epic many-course day was awesome, and the people I met there were great. We were all given cook books with all the recipes when we left, a parting gift for great thai meals of the future. A bunch of us planned to meet at a pub for the evening for more chats and finally some of the consistently desired chang.
We ended up meeting at spicy, a club, first before going for a wander to find the appropriate spot. We found "zoe in yellow," a loud outdoor ish music filled bar, which later became known to everyone as zoes, the place to be. The group was 2 couples, eefje (the awesome dutch girl from my hostel), another singleton, and michael, a boy from our hostel who eefje met earlier in her travels and decided to join us. The plan was to hang for a bit (we met at 830) and then go on our way, to clubs or whatnot. We ended up staying there for ages (till like 2) enjoying the bar.
There was a thai guy persistently trying to sell everyonr these string bracelets with words on them. Eefje was interested in getting one that said "same same," this kind of annoying phrase they say here... They'll say same same, but different when it's almost sorta similar, but not quite.. Like if the taxi driver doesn't know where you want to go, but still tries to take you. She didn't like the colours of the ones they had, so asked for a custom one, to which he tried to charge 250 baht. After much haggling, we got 2 for 200-- I got same same as well, but different colours from hers. The group then dished out for 3 more, of varying levels of stupidity, like ''I love myself." All tacky, all fun. We got to watch him make them, and were with him for ages so a few beers were bought in his honour. The group was great fun, but once it became 2, tiredness dragged me home.
That day was eefje's birthday, so aside from everyone buying her drinks, I also picked up a piece of cheese cake from a nearby cafe, birthday candles in 7 11 and we all sang happy birthday.
8am wake up meant catching my ride to the elephant farm for the day to train elephants... Or something like that. I didn't really know what I was in for, but knew that I 'had' to do it. The ride was long, in a red taxi with 4 chinese people who spoke no english. I slept a bit after finishing up the massive brekky I brought, and soon enough we stopped at a market to pick up bananas for the elephants. A bit after, we got to the park, jumbo park, and I quickly learned that I was the only one doing the riding that day, and the chinese counterparts were there to do trekking, which is more like riding in a weird carriage/box on the elephants back, after getting put into it off of a little lift. I was signed up to bareback. I was given a funny little outfit to wear since I'd be getting wet at the end-- loose pants, shirt, and a weird bandana scarf thing. No complaints. After changing I had some tea and sat to learn all the commands from the thai instructor. You'd get a little bamboo pole thing (for beginners-- they have metal tipped ones) and based on where you put it on the head, how you use your legs, and what you scream out, the elephant does different things (supposedly). Bai, kicking forward with your feet, and holding it across their head means forward. Toi (?), moving your body back and forth, and pulling the stick on their forehead means backward. Pae, having your hands crossed and the opposite (of where you want to go) arm pulling the stick by its ear, whilst kicking with that same leg, means turn that way, and lastly how, with the stick on the head, clamping your legs makes it stop.
Nezt bit was to get comfortable with the elephant by feeding it bananas. It was mostly just a throw-two-at-its-mouth kind of exercise, but I got a massive lick once. Bleh ha.
After I was tested on these commands, and shown how to get on to the elephant-- holy shit that was my biggest fear. You get it to bend it's knee, step on the knee while using the ear and a flap of leg skin as handles, and pull yourself up. The first time I got some help, but it wasn't as bad as it couldve been. Once on, I walked back and forth with it for a while practicing the commands. I realised how uncomfortable it is to be on the back of an elephant, clamping legs for dearlife to stay on, and supporting yourself awkwardly with your arms, all on a chair that isn't anyhting like a chair for humans.
Nezt I sat down for some lunch, which was spring rolls and noodles with chicken. Quite massive and filling. I got a fruitly desser and chatted with the thai people about the different fruits and veges in thailand. After some much needed digestion, I was off for the next leg of the tour-- an hour walk with the elephant around a track in the mountain area. I went with two korean trainers, who were speking to eachother in thai the whole time, which was the first time that day that I was kind of upset I was the only person at the tour. Otherwise it was good, getting more safe attention and not having to share an elephant. For the trek though it was difficult to control the elephant which kept veering off to eat branches, properly swinging them around whilst grabbing for leaves. It was a sport in ducking and trying to maintain use of my eyes. Once that bit was done we ended at a little river where I helped wash the elephant. All I could be bothered with though was freaking out about the chance of getting any of the water in my eyes or mouth. Some waterbourne illness was the last thing I needed for the day. Luckily, all was okay.
Next I went for a shower and change before heading out. On the way back we went to a dung factory (lol) and I learned about how elephant dung is used to make really beautiful papers. I bought a teeny piece as well as a hilarious oven mit (dunno why that was sold there as well). Eventually I was brought home again where I rested for a bit and met a bunch of the people in my room finally. Two girls and I decided to go to the temple where the monk chats were happening, even though they were to end an hour from then. We raced out, grabbe a redcar who knew where he was going (bullshit) and were on our way. He dropped off some people but we soon realised the driver was just going in circles.
It was getting late, and we were losing hope that anything would end up working out, so when he stopped to let some chick in a wheelchair in (how the fuck he thought that would work without a ramp was beyond me) we decided to cut our losses and just eject ourselves from the horrific situation. We were coached around for an hour, missed the chats, but had a pretty good time getting to know eachother on the travel. We opted for a tuktuk to get back, and while they got dropped off at some dimsum place, I went to the night bazaar for a wee walk around. There were so many things I wanted to buy, but will hold off until I'm done with my travels, so I neednt lug it around. The main desire was these nuts mchammer like harem pants. So many kinds, and so comfortable looking. I'll get them eventually.
After the market I went back to meet eefje for dinner, but had a while to hang first and started talking to someone who was in the main hanging room, at the table that has the best wifi. We chatted for ages and then I met all the girls he's been traveling with (he's studying in singapore now and just came for a weekend trip). They were surprisingly, and hilariously classy (maybe it's the backpacker differences getting to me) being all dressed up, pouring cocktails, and having little dishes with assorted snack foods like pistachios and dried bean things. Eefje got back around then, and we left to get food, and then meet everyone at zoes, which seemed to be the plan for multiple groups of people we met.
We went to a thai place which was super yummy and cheap, ezactly what we needed, and then headed to zoes. The same bracelet buy was there and we tried to advertise for him. Dunno if it was successful, especially because 4 mysteriously disappeared when michael wenr off with 2 racks to try to sell them. Still no one knows what happened. The night traveled to an outdoor fire show and a crazy reggae bar with an awesome live band before finally getting to the club we wantd to go to the night before (spicy). It was okay, but definitely nothing special, and my night wrapped up at like 4 am.
Come noon I was up and moving, as much as my hilariously sore legs would let me (I'm still sore from the elephant experience). I went to get a massive omelette breakfast but opted for a lazy day or flight/hostel bookings when I felt the beginnings of a cold coming on.
In the evening I met a great british indian guy who attributed his traveling to a 'quarter life crisis' and ended up ripping out. The entire vietnam section of my travel book to give him, since I wasn't going to go there.
Saturday night meant saturday night market where I walked around with eefje and michael (who left for muay thai after a bit) for ages, eating random foods and desserts, and then finding the perfect pair of harem pants to make up a new daily uniform for my next month. The desserts we tried were really weird, and the best thing I probably had were weird squid puff things. The scene was painfully crowded, and there were street performers all over. One particularly fun group were 4 blind men, sitting on the ground in a row, with various instruments, producing an awesome sound. Another fun one was a dude with a guitar sitting, using his toe, which had a drum stick tied to it, to have an accompanied rhythm section.
Once we were exhausted by that we went back for some much needed internetting. I also took the opportunity to create a makeshift menorah out of travel pamphlets, and used birthday candles to celebrate the first night of hanukkah. More bizarre contraptions to come.
Michael also returned at a point and though tired, I ended up staying up until 3 am chatting with him.
Comr morning the 3 of us met at 10am for breakfast at a cafe before I was off to arrive at the airport hilariously early for my flight to luang prabang.

Friday, December 7, 2012

Bangkok

The plane lands, we shuffle out. inhale, and there it is again. A new smell. The smell of thailand. Customs and immigration was super fast because I'm american, so you basically just smile at the wee camera and they say have fun for 30days! (Which by the way freaked me out since my flight home is in more than 30 days, but apparently if you leave the country, for even just an hour, and come back in, you get a new 30 visa. I can't imagine you could do this forever, but still!). I took 3 different trains, all easy to use and cheap (the first one, the mrt, uses little plastic tokens as tickets, that scan at the machine and get sucked back up at your destination) and then made it to my stop, surusak. The whole way I was drawn to the little tvs on board showing commercial after commercial, selling random crap in thai, mostly shown off by beautiful girls. I tried to follow the directions I read online, but immediately realised I was lost. I asked people for help and no one spoke english. I knew I was in the right area, just not where the hostel was. After mild (like 5 minutes worth of) panicked searching, the text of saphai pae was clear. I walked into the beautiful airconditioned lobby, checked in, and put my stuff upstairs. I came down to use the free internet and figure out my plan for the next month, and met a wonderful trio of similarly lone travellers. Otavio, vesselina, and nick. A thirty year old italian, 29 year old canadian, and 19 year old australian. After brief chats we were off to a little alleyway food market for dinner. It was great. You sit at a wee table, order from the lady who's cooking right next to you at her stand, and minutes later you have your plate, all for 50-100 baht (30 baht is one usd). We also got beers, chang being the desired, and ended up splitting 6 dishes of ricey/vegetabley/chickeny deliciousness. Figured it would only be appropriate to get pad thai as my first thai meal, and fuck yeah was that correct. Best pad thai ever. Once full we walked to 7/11 to get more beers (one big beer was 40 baht. Crazy!). Vess also got some sort of tiny yogurt culture drink that I tried. It was awesome. Though I didn't invest in any chips, the chip selection had everything from sushi flavoured to shrip flavoured lays.
When we got back to the hostel we met up with a whole other crew of people, drinking on the outside terrace. The plan of the evening was quickly determined to be one of going to see a pingpong show. If you don't know what that is, take caution in looking it up. We made our way out there and got pretty ripped off, paying 600 baht, but since we were all mildly terrified of getting robbed inside, we had no complaints. The show basically went for 30 minutes and then looped. It was... something. Feel free to ask me about it, for more info, but there were pompoms, fluorescent strings, darts, candles, and bottles. Be creative. It was especially funny to hear the opinion of our german gynecologist team member.

After the show the now 7 of us got into two tuktuks and essentially raced, in the terrifyingly dangerous ride that is in tuktuks to a club, because the red like district area we were in was skeeving us out far too much. After standing outside a mcdonalds, getting eaten for ages, we finally went towards it. The recurring theme of the evening up through to that pont was with otavio buying street food from almost every vender we passed, filling himself with sausage bits and whatnot.  Damian, the awesome dude that seemed to get us where we needed to go without fail (born in chicago, lives in ny, been travelling for more than a year so I guess it all makes sense) felt that bathroom urge I've grown to be so accustomed to since coming to asia, so I waited with him in a restaurant for a while before going in. The club was pretty expensive, and not too filled, but we all got our dance on, dancing on a massice stage in the center. Eventually we trekked back home.

Come morning I struggled to wake up, lost in the comforts of the great bedding, with no squeaking of a topbunk, and a real duvet for once. When I did make moves, I had been planning on going to pattaya as a day trip, but realised it was close to 3 hours each way. I decided to waste some time on the computer, booking more trips and actually looking at a map for the first time to actually map out where the hell it was reasonable to try to go in the month I have left. I met up with the german gynecologist again and followed him out to chinatown for some wanders. To get there we took the sky train and then a ferry, taking us through the water and to a chinatown pier. Right after getting off the boat I was 3 inches from getting hit by a massive backing up bus. Terrifying.

It was really crazy there, packed with people, motorbikes, and tons of crap on sale. We picked at street food and fruit while wandering, and when he tried to buy a single pen, found out you had to but the entire pack. After getting lost a bit (he was freaking out, cherishing the warmth of his lonely planet book, we went to a few temples.

They were gorgeous to walk around in, and we went to one with a massive golden buddha. You had to pay to get in, and I had to pay to borrow a cloth to cover my bare shoulders. Barefoot inside we went and took pictures with monks. I had to also borrow the pair of pants in his backpack since my shorts were too short. It was crazy to see and very interesting to watch people praying.

Post temples, we were off to the pier again to catch a longboat tour. By this time I had eaten some sort of squid on a stick, a mango, and something else that I couldn't identify. I thought it was chicken when I bought it, but it was way too not chicken like, being very cartilage like, and reminding me of ears. Oh well.

The boat tour was pretty cool, and went through a crazy canal filled with jumping fish and interesting housing structures. It was nice to see that side of bangkok. Kids were constantly waving from their backyards. Mid journey we were stopped by a floating market boat dude trying to sell us souvenirs, food and drink. It never ends. After the ride we took the subway the wrong direction without realising and wandered around the wrong town for an hour, but all good. When we finally got back I went up to slip a note under damiens door to beg him to come out with us at night, and ended up meeting two friends, traveling around as well. Alex, a finnish chick, and frederick, a dutch dude, both 21. With mild convincing they decided to join us on our next mission, to see muay thai. I took a quick shower, finally using some shampoo (there was a wee bit left in a bottle someone left there. Yay!) And we were off. During the train ride I asked a guy for directions, and after, again, minimum chat, he decided to join us on our journey. 19 year old german robert. We got to the boxing stadium, paid for the cheapest seats (standing, but still pretty expensive) and went in. The battle was crazy to watch, with some fighters looking 14 years old, and one mental knock out. Its a bloodsport.

We then went back and had beers at the hostel, though frederick was feeling iffy and went to bed. Somehow my note had worked and damien found us outside. We dwindled down to four, alex, robert, damien and me, and after a few beers (I also at this point realised why I kept getting so quickly drunk from chang. It's 6.4%, and tastes amazing) cabbed to kho sam road for some clubbing. We played drinking games at an outdoor bar, and then picked a club. On the way I noticed stands selling all different kinds of cooked bugs. You had to pay to take a picture, and I quickly convinced damien that if he bought me one I'd eat it. Though the massive scorpian was way too expensive, we went with a 50 baht cockroach. It was surprisingly meaty, and pretty good. Alex had a bite too (good bitch.) The club we went to was packed and we were dancing on an epic platformed bit. Dudes were kind of skeevy, and we all nursed tequila sunrise after tequila sunrise. It was prettty epic but closed at 3. We got pancake/crepe things and sat in subway for a while, as I was fighting to stay awake. When we got back I passed out hard, from another epic evening out.

In the morning I was woken up by a chick who works there (not the ladyboy. Okay, side note. Thailand is filled with ladyboys (dudes that go on as women) and they're usually pretty gorgeous. There's one that works at the hostel and was a real character to someone the night before, before I realised her deal, and then noticed her hands and voice. They're all over and we made an effort that night to try to find as many as we could) because robert stayed over in the bunk above me since he wasn't from our hostel, and I knew my room was pretty empty. He got locked out of the room (silly, I gave him the key) and was trying to get helped downstairs. I rescued his bags and went back to bed. Just before noon checkout I finally mustered up the strength to get up, and I went downstairs for brekky with frederick and alex. Omlettes (as well as pancakes) seem to be made differently in every country. Here they are fried in a weird, unhealthy tasting way. I then reminisced with damien about the pleasures of american foods, skyped for an hour, and booked various flights and a diving course. Woo! All coming together.

Eventually I finally made my lazy way to MBK, the massive shopping center of bangkok. It was a city. It was ridiculous. All I wanted to buy was a headstrap for my go pro, and after about 60 camera stores and stands (I jest you not, they have a whole area designated just to camera shops (and another to mobile phones which was fucking terrifying and I could barely navigate)) I still couldn't find one. To wash away my grief I went back to a sushi place that struck my eye earlier, fully packed and with a line of people. It was all you can eat (in an hour fifteen) with a pot of soup to cook things in, a conveyor belt of things to be cooked, a sushi section, assorted other asian food section, and drinks/ice cream area. Alone, I didn't have to wait very long and I sat at the bar with no idea of what to do or what the soup was for. Afte collecting a heaping plateful of crazy delicious and varied sushi I came back, now with a girl next to me, who showed me what the point of everything was, and how you cook things in the soup. She's from just outside bangkok and was super sweet, albeit there was a wee language barrier. She said she used to come to this place 5 times a week, and it's crazy addicting. For $10, I don't blame her. I filled up fast, cooking shrimp, clams, and crab (there were a lot of meats I couldn't identify and thus avoided) and a hilarious amount of sushi. My body said no more so I only had a few spoonfuls of icecream. I clocked in at 1 hour and was off, trying not to puke, back in the city of a mall. I found a great fanny pack to better secure my stuff, and contemplated buying mesh man-thongs to send as christmas gifts back to new zealand (don't worry, I didn't.) One annoying thing was that it was 2 baht to use the bathroom. Lame.

When I got back to the hostel I said some goodbyes, grabbed my shit, and was off looking for this bus station to get me to chiang mai. It was easy to get to (even though the metered taxi driver definitely drove out of the way a bit from the skytrain stop to the nearbyish transport center. Dicks) and when I got there the VIP bus that I wanted to take was about to leave. Perfect! I got the last seat on the massive double decker 24 seater for only $20, for a 9 hour night ride to chiang mai. The difference in price between a shitty regular bus, and this bus with massive reclining seats, blankets, pillows, a bathroom, a tv, and free snacks is about $5, so there was no reason not to splurge. we got a little sandwich which sorta looks like uncrustables, with the crust cut off, filled with tuna, a water bottle, and a soy milk juicebox. The tv played horrible thai game shows and then a movie.. All in thai, so it's merely background noise.

Monday, December 3, 2012

A Word on Escalators

Melbourne: escalators would go phenomenally slow until you get on them, and then pick up speed, as a means of saving energy I suppose.

Singapore: escalators would go phenomenally fast... that's all.

Singapore

Singapore is not for me. As much as I like the poles on the MRT that branch out into three and then reset to one so you neednt hold peoples hands on acident whilst riding, the city is weird. The people seem unfriendly and difficult to understand, and there is very bizarre architecture. The airport was pretty friendly when I landed with signs being clear and going to customs being simple, but that's mostly because I was off with my south african travel friend post landing to figure out our way out. He had been there before and had to run a few errands first, but I was in no rush enjoying his company. Once we parted ways on the MRT, I was chatting with another man who lives here, suggesting various ways of trekking the city.

Eventually I got to my hostel where it was mandatory to be shoeless in the majority of it, and got a little tour around. I could hardly understand him, but for some reason he moved me from a mixed 4 person dorm (where 3 guys had moved in) to a female 4 person dorm, with only one chick, which shouldve been more expensive, but didn't charge me. Whatever. The bed was hilariously uncomfortable and made noises like a garbage bag, as if it was a reasonable expectation for people to wet the bed. I fell asleep instead of exploring, as it was nearly 11 when settled.

I woke up a bit past 7am, to try to catch a wee skype date, and had to wait to shower, as everyone seemed like they were already awake. Riddled with only dudes, and I was the only white person in the hostel.

I was planning on going to sentosa island, but the weather of my one day here is horrifically overcast and humid. Instead I sucked up 4 hours of internet, skyping with a few people, uploading about 1000 pictures, and booking a few hostels for approaching destinations. As the morning wore on, I realised there are apparently a handful of white people in the hostel, mostly girls. After snacking a bit in the kitchen and talking to two really sweet girls from wellington, I decided to just go out and try to have a day. I walked around a bit looking for something, but found nothing worth doing, and opted to take the MRT for a while, doing a self guided massive city loop.

Biggest mistake ever. Aside from falling asleep briefly and having wicked dreams (I started my malaria meds today, and don't know if I can handle them.. Feeling a bit weird and uncomfortable), it was the worst, most boring, hour and a half ever. It's like, all this place is is buildings and malls. When I got off, I got painfully lost in a massive mall, only to get spit out into another massive mall. No one was helpful, no one spoke english (or they did but couldn't be bothered helping) and I was just feeling shit. I walked into a gorgeous hotel and they helped me take care of my desire to post things, and sent me off with a map, but for that to be the highlight of an afternoon is problematic. I wandered a bit but relied heavily on the mrt for it's lack of internal humidity and made my way to circular quay, which was actually sorta cool if you like spending way too much money on food and drink. Then I was going towards chinatown, map in hand, and was stopped by some older ugly dude asking if I needed help. Finally, some civilian with the fucking tact to be friendly. I said I was going to chinatown. He said I was in chinatown. I assured him I wasn't (fucking idiot.. I can read a map), and he responded by insisting on buying me a drink. The fuck? Obviously said no, and walked off hard. People are so strange. Chinatown had nothing exciting except offensive smells, so I mrt'd back to my hostel, to take a breather before going out in this hellish world again. As a pause of what is hellish, I invite you to read a couple of major irritations I've developed.

The mrt: you go to the ticket counter, and ask for help and instead of telling you the fucking easiest answer ever, they grunt and point to a sign. Yeah, I can read, but if you didn't fucking notice my nonasian face, I'm not from here and could use 2 seconds of your oh-so-precious time.
Then, you buy your overpriced metro card, and realise you bought a thick piece of plastic, that you later are to return to that machine to get back your unintented $1 deposit. Sure it's environmental, but it's ridiculous.
So now your waiting to get on the train, stainding in your fucking holding pin with arrows designating where you're supposed to stand if you're getting on, or getting off, and still no one obeys. I'll get back to this point though.

Cleanliness: not cleanliness, OCD. it's clean, I agree. The city probably saves heaps of money on cleaners (which isn't the best thing people!) But disallowing food or drink on subways, having a fucking sign there that even says 'no durians' (I see no sign for no body odor! Blasphemy), putting a bathroom sign that says 'close door after "big business",' a kitchen sign that suggests you not only wash your dishes after you use them, but before as well, and obnoxiously, like as if we didn't plan on doing it already, reminding on a trashcan to actually put your garbage inside is just rude and insulting.

The people: in addition to creepy-mcCreeps, the chinatown predator, I'm less than pleased with the majority of everyone else. Everyone stares uncomfortably on the mrt, and is extremely pushy, rude, and selfish. Maybe it's just the massive difference from the friendliness of bali, but regardless, it sucks. As I'm writing this a baby on the mrt keeps knocking at my legs, and it's 16 year old parents are to busy watching a movie on their fucking tablet to do anything... But it's not all bad. If you accidentally walk into them, they say sorry.

The control: as I said before with the mrt holding pins, everywhere there are signs telling you what you cannot do, controlling the fucking drones of humans that fill this country. Signs to walk on the left side of the hallway, signs not to jaywalk... Fuck, even chewing gum is banned in this country. Whilst at baggage claim with the aforementioned south african who set me on my way, he saw his surf board a wee ways away, and decided to jump on the belt, cross the center median, jump on the other belt, grab his board, and return in an equally hilarious, and honestly reasonable fashion. Shit like this is so not singapore.

I think this is what they call culture shock. Maybe I just can't handle being in a place as a complete minority, possibly shown by the constant smiles of hello I get from the few other white people I see. It's weird and even telling of a lot, and really changes my perspective. Or it could be the medicine and I'm just getting moody. We'll see when I get to thailand.

Night time got slightly less horrific as I made my way. The far journey to the night safari, an attraction I had been hearing about at their zoo.

You get there, after a train and a bus, wait in line a wee bit, pay a kinda steep price, go in and get seats for a show. It was pretty funny and way more ridiculous and interactive than any show I had ever seen at a place like that. I sat with a girl who was also stopped over in singapore on her way from sydney to ireland, and we both were entertained by their forceful volunteer work, not giving some man a choice of whether or not he wanted a massive snake on his back, only after making the entire first 4 rows absolute flip a shit and move from their seats when they tricked everyone into thinking they lost the next animal for the show (which was that snake). The two asian ladies in front of me screamed and jumped back two rows when it came near. They trained otters to put cans/plastics/papers into recycling bins, and it was overall a great show. After that there's a 45 minute tram ride through a zoo like area, but there are no enclosures, so the animals were hilariously close to the open walls of the tram. Unfortunately it singapoured which put a damper on the ride (tacky, I know.. I can't help myself) and lessened my interest to then pursue a walking tour. It was already nearing 10 pm so I decided to trek back and go to this 'lavander food market' that the girls from nz were raving about in the morning, just a few blocks from my hostel.
24 hours of delicious, cheap, and heavily random food. I wandered first to find the weirdest thing I could order, and after juggling pig intestine soup and fish head curry, I went for frog porridge. I bought a tiger beer as well, to ensure that I try the beer of each country. I wasn't even sitting for 2 minutes before the 3 boys at a nearby table told me to come there. I insisted on them joining me, for my food was arriving based on my table number, and they eventually agreed. 3 students from the phillipines traveleing with their college (all staying in my hostel which explained the mass amount of phillipino people there! It all makes sense now.) They were great fun and there was barely any language barrier. Jon, joe and harlo ordered a hilarious amount of food, and ended up actually making pretty solid headway on it. My frog porridge was delicious. By the end of the late dinner I learned a few words, was given some pesos and a little coin purse, and had it determined that joe was my phillipino boyfriend in singapore. Ha. We walked back and I hung out with me adorable spanish roommate maria for a while sharing stories of our travels before heading to bed.
Come morning I woke up, packed up, and ran to the mall hoping to buy a gopro. I forgot that the whole world didn't run on my time, and that there was no way it would be open at 9 am. I chatted with an airport shuttle driver until 1015, when I decided if it ddidnt open by 1030, I'd have to leave. Idiot jennie then realised there's an information desk that would provide this info, and after finding out it opened at 11, I ran to get an airport taxi. Check in was easy, but when I tried to progress to customs I was stopped to weigh my bag. I thought the weight limit was 10kg, so I was doin that thing with wearing everything I owned, but when I rang in at nearly 11 she said I was 4 kg over, and it's $20 a kg. I took out a bunch, and she was pretty helpful, and got it down to a little over 9. She said I owed 40, but I freaked out that all I had was 35 and she was like, okay, I'll just write it was 1 kg over. What a lovely lady! I got in just fine and wandered the massive airport, lined with gorgeous stores. I ended up finding my desired gopro, for cheaper than at the mall because of duty free and whatnot, and then ate some lunch (noodly chickeny thing?) At the place that my arrival parnter of south africa had recommended. It was yummy and before I knew it I was on the plane, off to bangkok!

Indonesia Wrap Up

There were a few other things I noticed and wanted to say about my stay in indonesia. Firstly most places you go, you are to remove your shoes, something that didn't surprise me necessarily but was interesting to manage. Also, as part of the hindu culture, every 4th person essentially has the same name. There are 4 names that get cycled (and slightly appended with a ni for girls) based on your birth order. The first child is wayan, the second made, third nyoman, and fourth ketut. After that, the order starts again with the 5th child havingt he same name as the first. It was really weird and interesting to learn about.
Another thing is the body type. They were all quite thin (generally), and quite short.
As I've mentioned before, the currency of this place is quite hilarious due to it's conversion, but even more hilarious when instead of getting back change in some stores (like a 200 piece or something) they'd give you a candy.. Or a handful of candies. Alas, one cannot pay for things though with the collection of said candies.

All of the post offices there rather sketched me out so the letters that I've been holding since melbourne have still gone unsent.

Last really defining part of indonesia for me is the friendliness. While biking the other day I was constantly waved to, hi fived, and asked about my wellbeing. It was like everyone was thrilled to see me there, a random white girl from around the world. Kids would scream hello all the time, and though a wee bit weird similarly amazing and welcoming.

Saturday, December 1, 2012

Ubud

So, when I got to Ubud finally after the horrific boat ride and meh-at-best bus ride, I decided it would be smart to follow the three girls that were traveling together from the bus. They were all british and seemed to know where they were going, or at least had a plan of where to stay for the time they would be in Ubud, which Is more than I was able to say for myself. Ubud doesn't have a hostel really like all the other cities I've been staying in. They have hotels and they have homestays, which means you stay in some person's extra room. Instead of taking a taxi [so much regret] they wanted to walk, so I followed. They were okay. one was pretty cool, and the other two kind of weird, but whatever. we walked in the blisteringly hot sun, packs and all, for a half hour in the wrong direction... then a half hour in a different wrong direction... then another half hour finally in the right direction... i don't understand why they didn't ask the locals for more help, but I was just jiving and not too bothered initially. When we finally found the place that they 'had' to stay at [mind you they had no reservations or anything, and we passed about a hundred adeuate looking places on the way] it was not only too expensive, but they had no rooms... We spent a bit more trying to figure out the place right near by, and after getting showed around in the most time consuming of fashions, were told once again that they had no rooms [which onestly makes 0 sense because it's low season in bali]. By this time I was fed up, done, and didn't even want to be with these people anymore. I went my own way and said yes to the first guy on the street offering me a homestay for only 100,000 a night [10bucks]. it was ghetto. pretty random, up some alleyway staircase, but it was private with one massive bed and a bathroom. Figured It'd work. Next move was to do laundry for the first time since leaving New Zealand. I got a good whif of my bag in Gili and knew that it was crucial. I left it downstairs with the lady that owned the art store which is below where I was staying, and she said it would be done by the next day. Next move was to get out to find some internet and figure out what the fuck I was going to be doing on this wee trip. I found a pamphlet in my room that advertiseda biketrip, checked out the site, and called the dude that ran it. Plan for the next day, done. As for Thursday, it was nearing 6pm and as I wandered the streets I saw no one. There were balinesians, old couples, and that's about it. Bars and restaurants were empty, and I was getting a dodgy vibe. Every so often I would see someone who wasn't horribly far away from my age, and alone, and I was trying to muster up the courage to stop them and ask them what was up. Finally, after waiting too long, I saw a chick with crazy colourful dreds walking towards me, and decided it was time. I popped the question 'hi, i know this is probably a little weird, but I just got here and don't know what to do with myself. where is everybody?' she asked if I wanted to get a drink, and a wee wander and stop in a reggae bar later, I had a new friend. Molly, the 29 year old californian here on business as a tattoo filled accountant. We talked for ages, I had some pizza [such a mistake.. the next day was one with a bali belly morning, and it wasn't even good enough to cure my western food cravings. I also tried shem which is like the rice wine  of bali. sweet, good, but couldn't replace bintang as my bali drink of choice. 

We talked for ages and learned all about eachother, and fuck I found an awesome person. Eventually she had to head out for a brief dinner date, so I stayed in the bar with free wifi and chatted up my family [convenient my brother was on a early as bus trip at the time]. The bar was pretty empty for a while, but eventually started filling with a few people, and I got into a long chat with a balinese guy who was a tattoo artist and asked me a million questions about my camera. He was a bit of a close talker so when Molly came back with an additional friend, I stuck to that situation. Introduce new member, jon, the 24 year old bald happiest-guy-i've-ever-met web builder [i think?] from california who left the country on a whim with only $2000 dollars, ages ago. They had just met as well, and the trio became exactly what I had been looking for all day. After chats and drinks and the start of some live reggae music [they have a band there every night], Molly's boss and his friend also joined us, bringing the age range of the crew astonishingly high, but so awesome. Pu Tzu is her boss, and he's such a festival loving hippy, constantly starting new businesses and budding new ideas, acting as a gem dealer whilst in bali and picking up things to sell back in his californain store. The night waged on, but with an early morning wake up I decided it was time to head off. I knew I was close to where I was staying,, but as a small room on top of a random store, I wasn't quite sure where I was going. I walked until I saw something familiar, freaking out about all the stray dogs on the street, two of which who were fighting right near me, and realised I was lost. After a wee wander back and forth, and asking a balinese dude on a motorbike for help [he drove up and down the streets looking for it] I was home.

The next morning I was up and moving at 7 am because It was so goddamn hot in my room [a fan just wasn't quite cutting it] and I got picked up at 8am for my adventure to the mountains and mountainbiking. A nice balinesian man was driving and we went to pick up two more passangers from a nearby hotel, Kim and Eowin, the two late twenties, early thirties girls from Holland. We drove for a little over an hour and sotpped at a coffee place to sample different types of coffees and teas from Bali. We learned about the coffee making process which was pretty cool and were shown a bunch of coffee plants, and then sat down for some fruit and coffee sipping. Everything was delicious, especially the hot chocolate they prepared from cocoa plants there. I decided to add in another $5 to the trip to try the luwok coffee, which was is a crazy weird speciality that's expensive to find anywhere else. This kind of coffee is made from beans that a mongoose has eaten, digested the outer sweet bit of, and then pooped the rest out, fermenting it in their stomachs with their high fruit diets. Then it is cleaned, peeled, and turned into coffee - supposed to be the best coffee ever, and it was pretty goddamn good. We tried some chocolate there as well,, including a chili chocolate that made us all cough a bit, and then were off for the next stop.

Next we drove up a wee bit more and got to a really high spot at a breakfast restaurant where we were outside overlooking a gorgeous volcano and landscape. I ordered fried bananas, which were pretty epic, and we all chatted. Then, from the restaurant there were 4 bikes waiting for us, and a new tour guide for the bike tour. It was 90% downhill, and only sometimes really sandy, but mostly pretty easy. The bike I was riding had really shitty breaks so I was kind of nervous racing down hills, and with this being my first time mountain biking, I was pretty retarded and incapable when we were riding on dodgy bits or sand. All was well thoguh and we stopped at a couple of temples and rice patties. We got to see how much work goes into farming rice which was amazing, and even pick some rice off of the bits and peel and eat it [obviously not the same as cooked rice, but whatever]. We also stopped at a traditional house set up and learned how they have 4 different homes, all with different purposes, sort of like the Maori. One home is the honeymoon home, where the people are intended to have sex. Conception in the hindu culture is only appropriate when there's a full moon or half moon, or a few other chosen holidays/days of the year, so the kid is okay. Oh! and I also learned what the little bananaleaf things are. They're offerings that are made and placed out daily for the god. word.

Our guide was telling us that the sleeping room is usually crowded with like 3 generations of people, and it's very hard for poor people in the country. He also said that finding a wife is impossible when you're poor because the women of the country are very materialistic and if he doesn't have a car, he can't meet anyone. He works very hard to support 4 people on his own, and is 27... even though while we were biking he insisted to me that he's 40. People here don't look very old, unless they're super old. They barely have wrinkles and are very small and thin. 3 hours later we were at some dude's house where they prepared a traditional balinese lunch for us. The food was delicious and i had a whole new respect for rice. Pork, chicken, tofu, green beans, and omelette were all there for us to pick at, in various sauces and preparations.We were all a little bummed that neither of the tourguides were eating with us, and kind of felt wierd about them eating something else inside instead, but after we were done eating we chatted with them again over tea. One of the dutch girls was insisting on helping the bike tour guide learn how to read english better, and he also told us a few stories and showed us amazing paintings. After all this, I was dropped back at the homestay where I picked up my laundry [which has the weirdest fake deoderant like smell to it] and then ran back to the reggae bar where I was planning to meet the crew of yesterday. Tomato juice accompanied my wait and the groops gathered with plans of going to eat at some apparently awesome and cheap spot.


To get there we took motorbikes, my first time on one. I sat on the back of Pu Tzu's and Molly on the back of Jon's [she tried to ride one earlier that day but was absolutely terrified and ended up noninjuriously falling off]. It was super fun and kind of scary but the trip was short and the place we got to ended up being pretty epic. I wasn't too hungry so I only got an avocado salad with papaya juice, and ended up sharing shrimp crackers with everyone, which lemonated avocado on shrimp cracker is the greatest food combination. Jon was trying to learn indonesian with a little book he got, and was more just creating reggae songs after random phrases he found, like the one for 'where should we go to eat'. Next we were off to some bar that Pu Tzu's friend had just opened for drinks and chat, wehre the age average was even higher and I spent a while chatting with a 47 year old about tasmania, watching jon watercolor an elephant, the owner have a bit of a feminist rant, and a few babies try beer. Once it was getting late, and I felt the pain of the sunburn from the day set in, we biked back to the place Molly was staying and chilled in the pool briefly before going back to our hub, the reggae bar. The reggae bar was called napi orti, which we thought was funny since it had nappy in the name. but then learned that it just means 'you're welcome'... or something like that. I'm not entirely sure.

The music Friday night was a bit different, not having a reggae feel, and the place more crowded. I was able to convince two irish guys I met in Gili to make there way to the bar as well, and everyone got silly, danced hard, and had an amazing time. We went back to the pool afterwards, even though one of the guys didn't know how to swim [he was tall enough to not be nervous anywhere] and swam around until we were properly cold [a good feeling after sweating balls for so long] and then went off to bed. This morning I woke up and went to Molly's to somehow join in on her hotel's free breakfast and then go to the monkey sanctuary. Pu Tzu came with us and it was seriously one of the coolest weirdest things ever. There were monkeys everywhere, fighting and stealing things from tourists. I took heaps of pictures and had an awesome time listening to Pu Tzu be the announcer for a hilarious monkey battle, and see Molly lose her waterbottle to a charging tiny monkey screaming for it. After I shopped a bit, buying a bintang shirt [the flavor of bali] and a penis keychain [fertility or something, but they're everywhere] and then was off to the airport! In the airport I met an awesome south african guy and we chatted the whole way through the worst airport experiece I've ever had.

 I'll explain. I got there, had to explain all these things to a guy who didn't know what tiger airways was, and then go in for a weird secuirty check. Then I searched far and wide for the place to properly check into my flight, and saw nothing. I asked a couple of guards for tiger airways and they laughed at me, asking if I also wanted lion airways... I didn't understand what was going on or why no one knew the airline, but I was incredibly early and decided the right thing to do would be to sit down for a bit and wait, hoping that check in wasn't open yet. When the flight was two hours away, check in finally opened and I got online. Second in line and it still took 45 minutes [this is when I met the south african dude]. They were incompetant and incredibly slow about everything. Level two of annoying was going to customs where again I had to wait a retardedly long time watching asian travelers jump between lines to find the fastest one, and then deal with an irritating officer. Then we had to go and pay to leave the country [$15 bucks essentially, but what?] After thatbullshit was done, there was a massive walk to the gate, which wasn't even open. I wandered and ate some soup and a cookie and the gate didn't open until 10 minutes before the flight was to take off. Getting in there was again an incredibly stupid an incompetant process, but whatever. I made it to the plane and was off to Singapore!!!

Kuta-Gili

Next plan of kuta was to day drink. we all got bintangs, which are the local beers and sort of taste like sapporo, and played beersbee. We used the weird small childrens plate purchased in the mall as a frisbee. Sidenote- mall was really weird and crazy, especially the supermarket where I saw fruits and vegetables that I could not identify. The game works like this- there are two wooden poles in the grass like 20 meters from eachother and two teams, one at each side. The teams take turns throwing the frisbee at the poles, which each have an empty can on them. If you hit the can, the other team finishes their drink. The pole, the other team drinks half the drink, them, they sip, and if they catch it, you drink. If you don't make it all the way to the pole you drink as well. Pretty soon we were all getting pretty drunk. Chats were amazing, finding someone who's a graphic designer at home who understood what the hell I was talking about, and the chick who owns the hostel brought out fruits for us to snack on. I bought a few weird fruits at the supermarket and tried them at this point. One looked like a brain on the inside, and I now know how to eat a dragonfruit, and well, what it is. For dinner I went into town and got vegetarian food at some little place. Eggplant and tofu mostly, with a hard boiled duck egg as well. Weird, but pretty yum. After we got back we drank and hung out until night and were off to bed. 

Come morning we were moving at 615am, eating pancakes and waiting for the shuttle bus to scoop us from the hostel and bring us an hour and a half away to some harbor, where we'd get the fast boat to gili island. While waiting for the boat we were pestered incessently by locals with baskets of fruit and junk food to sell to us. Many carried them on their heads, and they were filled with things like pringles and oreos. They wouldn't stop asking if we wanted 'sweet mango,' and I ended up buying banana chips. Every few minutes a dude came with heaps of cheap sunglasses as well to sell. Pretty annoying, but all good. The boat was really comfortable and fun. They gave us a little snack and water and it only took a little over an hour before we were at our destination, scaling around the side of the boat to get off. We wandered to a hostel and checked in to the awesomely decorated air conditioned room. The showers are salt water showers, so my hairs been gross and matted down since we arrived, but everything was perfect otherwise about the rooms, with bes randomly elevated all around. The hostel itself is also crazy cool with a cheap upstairs bar and comfy lounge area filled with floor pillows. We went for some lunch at a cute restaurant (all restaurants here are outside). I got some sorta seafood salad and avocado juice, which was weird but I had to try it. As it stopped being cold, it was definitely less appetizing, but whatever. The whole lunch, with tax, cost only $4.50. Nuts. We then went to the beach where I went for a snorkel and talked to a bunch of locals. The water was so perfectly warm and still, and the coral and fish beautiful. There was so much to see.
After we were exhausted by that we went back tor a great 3 hour nap. Then after showers were off to the night market for dinner. I ended up getting fish at a stall where you pick a fresh fish, and then they grill it for you and serve with veggies and rice. For $4, it was amazing. We went back to the hostel after collecting more people and drank ourselves silly with $2 double local drinks. We played a ton of games and did all-hostel group shots. At about 11 we made our way to the full moon party on the beach, the goal of the night. There were so many people, so many bon fires, and so much dancing. It was absolutely epic and there was a crazy fire show. I ended up going back and passing out though not too late, ready for a rest before the new day. 
Come morning I went up for the free brekky of scrambled eggs and chatted for ages with the people upstairs. At noon I decided to rent a snorkel and flippers with the dude I was chatting with and we went out to the end of the island (the whole island is walkable in 1.5 hours around) where we went out really far looking at the amazing creatures. The weather was amazing, the water clear, the temperature perfect, and the experience so tranquil. We were out for like 2 hours floating around the schools of jumping fish. After going for a wee dive down for a picture though I learned that the 3 meter limit on my camera is true. Regrettfully, my camera has died a very premature death. I shouldve bought the more expensive better one :/. Next time. On our way back we stopped for a $1 local meal of... Something? It was an edible cracker like bowl filled with rice bits that had been wrapped in banana leaves, with some green veggie, sprouts, and peanutty spicy sauce. Really delicious and a great lunch for the day. 
Next was lounging, enjoying the amazingness that is this island.
It's a crazy tranquil place, aside from the mosque's frequent loud speaker chant filling our ears and brainwashing all the muslims here, assumingly. It's different from bali in this religious bit, but the only strong way I've seen that is in the fact that all over bali there are little square leaf/banana leaf maybe made vessels filled with flowers, other colourful stuff, and sometimes a wee bit of rice. They leave these 5x5 inch contraptions on the floor of places or desks. I'm not sure what they're for exactly, but it's some hindu tradition. I'll find out.
Everywhere here the stores advertise their sale of magic mushrooms, which are legal here even though weed warrents the death penalty. Weird. 
Also, as compared to the motorbikes filling the streets in bali, here there are only push bikes and horses pulling littke carriages. Nothing motorised. 
This is the best place I've ever been, filled with the best people. 
After relaxation, some drawing (I was inspired by my snorkeling companion to draw) of people I was with and bizarre cartoons, the troops gathered and we went to the night market for dinner. I got some sorta noodle with tofu, veggies, other stuff I couldn't identify and chicken. Twas delicious and only $3. The fresh fish was again purchaSed by some, and I was convinced to rat its eyeball, with very little bribery. Weird, gummy, and strangely tasty.

At 8pm we went to the cinema, which for them is a bunch of outdoor lounge chairs in a sort of canvas enclosure with a projector set up and two different films playing each night. We watched 'in time' or whatever it's called with justin timberlake and got free popcorn and drank beers. It was a really funny way of watching a fil, only mildly irritated by the loud music at the bar next door. Our group expanded quite a bit, now with 2 more americans, one being a chef from alaska, a few irish guys and a dutch girl.

We went back to the hostel's bar and began our fill of drinking games again, with the crowd favorite being horseracing (you set up all the aces next to eachother and then 7 other cards vertically like a track on the side and then everyone makes bets on suit.. Like 5 drinks on hearts or whatever, and to place your bet you take 5 drinks. Then, from the deck cards get flipped over one by one and based on the suit, the related ace moves up a spot. Once all have passed the 3 card mark, everyone takes a drink. This continues till one of the aces finishes all 7 moves, and whichever suit won, gives all the people who bet on it twice as many drinks to give out). After ages of this we went to the irish bar for a party. Apparently wednesday is the big night out in gili, and it was. Dancing and drinking and hanging around until 4 am, when I went home for my brief sleep.

Come morning I was back to a free breakfast, chats with a girl about malaria medicine, and then out to catch my boat back to bali. I was hung over and got really seasick on the boat, but until that kicked in I was chatting for ages with a canadian guy who was on his honeymoon with his wife, doing almost exactly the same travel track as me. After spending an hour and a half trying not to puke, we were back on the island, and back to being pestered by locals to buy their random crap. Some nice indonesian lady gave me a wood necklace as a gift, because she said I remind her of her daughter, which makes very little sense to me, seeing as I'm not even vaguely indonesian, and we didn't exchange any conversation initially. Won't complain!